I discuss that issue in this video. If you are asking and wondering if your ex wants you to chase, I explain that the answer is most likely, “Yes.”
But that does not mean that you should chase your ex just because they want to be chased.
Just because they want it to happen does not mean that it will bring them back if you do it.
In fact, it will most likely do the exact opposite!
Chasing your ex is an ego stroke for them so it should not come as a surprise that your ex would like and enjoy that.
If you chase your ex, he or she will feel more attractive and confident. Who would not like feeling like that?
If you want your ex to come back, chasing them is the worst thing that you could do.
When you chase, you ingrain yourself in backup-plan mode with your ex which means that they will feel even less attraction for you due to the chasing.
Your ex will also not feel the consequences of the breakup or any kind of feeling of loss from not having you as a lover, boyfriend, or girlfriend.
Your ex must feel the loss from the breakup and in order for that to happen, they can’t feel that you are easily gotten back right away.
Your ex must feel concern or fear that you could move on and if you are chasing and pursuing your ex, they have no reason to feel any concern that you’ll move on.
When you don’t chase or pursue, your ex wonders why and that will often make them start to examine and consider their decision.
This will also often lead to them being concerned or even afraid that you are moving on or at least could.
This is key because it’s the only time when your ex can truly feel at least some of the loss of the breakup and that is required to getting them to want you back.
It is only when your ex feels loss, misses you, and recognizes the importance that their relationship with you held in their life that they will take action to attempt to get back together with you.
Chasing your ex will only prevent them from being able to recognize and feel those things.
Though it is difficult, you must resist the urge to chase, beg, pursue, and contact your ex. I realize that doing so is counter to what you feel you want to do and should do.
That is because you are feeling the polar opposite to your ex. You feel the loss. The loss of your ex, the loss of the relationship, and the loss of control.
Your ex, on the other hand, feels empowered and in control of the entire situation. You must pull the rug out from underneath them, so to speak, so that they feel the loss of control, the loss of you, and the loss of the relationship.
When that happens, your ex will feel what you feel now – the intense desire to reunite. Your ex will then be the one reaching out to you, wanting to talk and for you to consider taking them back.
In order for the tables to turn and the roles to switch, you must resist the urge to chase or else your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend will continue to feel in control, more attractive than you, and that you are their backup plan should they ever change their mind (but they are very unlikely to if you chase).
It will take resolve, discipline, and knowledge to avoid doing the wrong things that will push your ex away.