My Ex Wants Me Back: What Should I Do Now?

So, your ex wants you back.

Now what?

That’s a moment you’ve probably imagined countless times, especially if you’ve been going through the emotional rollercoaster of a breakup.

It’s natural to feel a mix of emotions—excitement, relief, confusion, and maybe even a little fear.

The big question now is, what do you do next? How do you handle this delicate situation to give your relationship the best possible chance of success?

I’m going to guide you through the steps you should take when your ex expresses a desire to get back together.

This isn’t about rushing into anything or simply picking up where you left off.

Instead, it’s about making sure that if you do get back together, the relationship is stronger and healthier than before.

I’m going to share five key points that you should consider to navigate this situation with clarity and confidence.

1. Take a Step Back and Reflect

I know, it sounds cliche, but this is different.

The first thing you need to do when your ex wants you back is to take a step back.

This might seem counterintuitive—after all, you’ve likely been waiting for this moment.

But it’s crucial to give yourself time to reflect on the situation before you make any decisions.

Ask yourself some important questions:

• Why do they want to get back together now?
• What has changed since the breakup?
• Have the issues that caused the breakup been addressed?
• How do you truly feel about getting back together?

It’s easy to get caught up in the emotions of the moment, but you need to make sure that this is what you really want and that it’s the best thing for both of you.

Reflect on the reasons why the relationship ended in the first place.

If those reasons haven’t been resolved, then getting back together might just lead to the same problems down the road.

2. Avoid Rushing Into Things

Your ex should see that you aren’t sure and that you are moving foward slowly and cautiously.

It shouldn’t feel like you are throwing them a party for wanting to get back with you.

When your ex reaches out and says they want to get back together, there’s a natural temptation to jump right back into the relationship.

After all, you’ve probably been missing them, and the idea of being back together might seem like the solution to all your problems.

But rushing into things can be a mistake.

It’s important to take things slowly.

If you rush back into the relationship without addressing the underlying issues that led to the breakup, you’re likely setting yourselves up for another breakup in the future.

Plus, if you take your ex back too quickly, it can lower your attraction.

So, what should you do instead?

Be willing to consider getting back together.

Tell your ex that you are open to the idea of getting back together but that you aren’t sure and you want to take it one day at a time.

Don’t give everything back to your ex all at once.

Make them earn it back and earn you back so that their appreciation will increase rather than taking you and your love for granted.

3. Actions Speak Louder Than Words

One of the biggest mistakes people make when their ex wants to get back together is relying too much on words.

Your ex might say all the right things—they might apologize, promise to change, and express how much they miss you. But words alone aren’t enough.

You need to see action. Words are easy; actions take effort.

If your ex truly wants to get back together and make it work this time, they need to show you through their behavior.

This means that they need to make real changes, not just talk about them.

For example, if communication was an issue in the past, are they making an effort to communicate better now?

If there were trust issues, are they taking steps to rebuild that trust?

Pay close attention to how they’re acting, not just what they’re saying.

This will give you a much clearer picture of whether they’re truly committed to making the relationship work.

4. Establish New Boundaries and Expectations

When getting back together with an ex, it’s essential to establish new boundaries and expectations for the relationship.

The relationship ended for a reason, and if you want to avoid repeating the past, you need to make sure that you’re both clear on what’s expected moving forward.

This could involve setting boundaries around communication, time spent together, how you handle disagreements, or how your ex presents themselves around the opposite sex (inappropriate, flirting, etc.).

It’s also important to discuss any new expectations you might have now that you’ve had time apart to reflect on what you need from a relationship.

Boundaries are not about creating distance; they’re about creating a healthy space where the relationship can thrive.

They’re about ensuring that both of you feel respected, valued, and understood.

Take the time to have these conversations, and don’t be afraid to be honest about what you need.

It’s better to have these discussions upfront than to let issues fester and potentially lead to another breakup.

5. Detach Yourself To The Outcome

You know yourself and your relationship better than anyone else.

If something feels off, pay attention to that feeling.

If you’re excited but also nervous, that’s normal.

If you feel like something isn’t quite right, take the time to explore that feeling before making any decisions.

It’s also important to be prepared for any outcome.

Your ex should know that you are willing to be without them if they are going to treat you like a second-class citizen in the relationship again or if you are convinced they will only break up with you again.

Getting back together with an ex doesn’t guarantee that things will work out.

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the relationship might not be salvageable.

And that’s okay.

What’s important is that you approach this situation with a clear mind and a realistic perspective.

Remember, your happiness and well-being are the most important things.

If getting back together with your ex is the right decision, then that’s great.

But if it’s not, you need to be strong enough to walk away.

It’s better to be single and happy than in a relationship that doesn’t bring you the peace and joy you deserve.

Conclusion

Getting back together with an ex is a big decision, and it’s one that shouldn’t be taken lightly.

By taking the time to reflect, avoiding the rush, focusing on actions, establishing new boundaries, and trusting your instincts, you can approach this situation with clarity and confidence.

Remember, you have the power to decide what’s best for you.

If your ex truly wants to make the relationship work, they will show it through their actions and their willingness to make necessary changes.

And if you both decide to give it another shot, make sure that it’s based on a foundation of mutual respect, understanding, and a shared commitment to making the relationship stronger than before.

Your journey back to love doesn’t have to be rushed. Take your time, and make sure that this time around, it’s built to last.

Get my Emergency Breakup Kit to get your ex back!

Sincerely,

Coach Lee